Conventional wisdom
Young people should not smoke. With all the information available they should know better. Sometimes though teenagers experiment smoking and it is just because they are in a rebellious phase so it does not really mean anything.
What if
What if it meant something? What if smoking were the sign that your teenager is already in trouble? What if statistics proved it in overwhelming fashion?
In North America basically one third of our teenage population smokes. This is roughly the same percentage as pot smoking. Are those two statistics directly related? Well, yes and no, let us examine it. When asked if they were regularly smoking pot regular smokers said yes in a ratio of 75%. When we asked non smokers if they did pot, only 3% of them answered yes. Basically what it means is that smokers are 25 times more likely to smoke pot than non-smokers.
It does not end there. Smokers have a much higher risk of dropping out, getting caught in criminal activities, misbehaving in school, doing hard drugs (in rehabilitation clinics there is a 98% cigarette smoking population), engaging in sexual activities at a much younger age (the ratio of unwanted pregnancies among young female smokers is astonishing). In short, the future of a smoking teenager statistically looks very bleak and parents should recognize the danger, to be able to deal with the situation adequately.
Because smoking is only a sign and not a cause getting the teenager to quit will do nothing to solve the problem (although it might be a positive move from a health standpoint). You have to realize that the teenager is not smoking alone. The fact that the teenager is smoking means two things that are more or less related. The first thing is that the teenager, at this point, is not confident to do well in the adult world and because of that is not even likely to seriously try. This issue can not be addressed in one conversation. It is a long process of strengthening the teen’s image in order to change that perception. As I said if a child is smoking rest assured that the self-image of that child has been troubled for a long time and you have a steep hill to climb to get back to normal.
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The second thing to consider is that if the teenager has been smoking, it means that the child has been surrounding himself or herself with individuals who do not trust their future in the adult world and are therefore a bad influence on the child. Slowly but surely, the child must accept to make changes into his or her circle of friends. It is impossible to change a child self-image if that child by his or her choice of friends still adheres to psychological beliefs that are self defeating.
The bottom line is that nowadays (and only nowadays) if a child is smoking, the odds that this child will experience a happy youth (or a happy adult life at that) are almost nil. |
In passing along these statistics I see two major difficulties. One is that parents who love their children simply do not want to face the facts. They dismiss the information out of love thereby negating themselves maybe a last chance to solve a problem. People do that everyday… with terrible consequences. Chances are that if you are intellectually able te read this web site you are normally the kind of parent who would be able to help a child deal with his or her lack of self-esteem. You are also not supposed to have a kid who smokes but that is not a very nice thing to say, is it?
The second thing is that you have to understand that although smoking has not changed, what it means definitely has. The person who smoked 30 years ago did not have a self image problem. To look at a 49 year-old smoker who seems to be doing well (even if it is you or your spouse) to rationalize the smoking of a 16 year-old is suicidal. The old smoker is not on a par with today’s young smoker. Not by a long shot. Smoking by itself is not bad. What it means for you is another thing but if you do not like it … dismiss it as rubbish.
What to make of it
The bottom line is that nowadays (and only nowadays) if a child is smoking, the odds that this child will experience a happy youth (or a happy adult life at that) are almost nil. Smoking is literally a cry for help that should not go unheard by parents ar adults in position of responsibility.
In this entry I have used both the terms teenager and child indiscriminately because obviously if you have a smoking 10 year-old you face the same problem, only magnified.